Failure is Feedback is NOT failure

I’ve been joining in the Love Links linky (which is great ‘cos it has the added incentive of being a kinda competition too – and I’m not competitive at all me, nooooooo ).  Ali from Sprinkles and Sprogs left a really interesting post on it about her little one starting to talk….. but what was really interesting was her fear of failure and it prompted this NLP post.

Following on from my other posts in the NLP series, today I’m going to look at another of the NLP presuppositions:

“There is no such thing as Failure, only Feedback.”

As Theodore Roosevelt said, “It’s hard to fail, but it is worse never having tried to succeed.”  All successful people are used to failure – they know what it is to fail, for success is not possible without failure.  Without failure it is impossible to learn, it’s impossible to know where we shine and where we do less well, it’s impossible for us to know how we can best navigate this thing called life.

We can fail blindly or we can be brilliant with our failures;  that is, we can fail again and again in the same way at the same thing or we can choose to learn from our failure.  It might be that we decide we’ve failed so spectacularly that we don’t bother to do that thing again or it might be that we do it better next time….. either way, we learn and we move on.  If we stick with never trying then we get stuck – literally and figuratively.  Phobias are extreme examples of this.  So, take the plunge, get over your fear and do something you’ve been wanting to do but have been afraid of.  Then let me know how you get on.

Our education system would do well to take this on board.  Our obsession with ‘elf n’ saftey stops us from allowing our children to take risks.  Our media sells us a constant story of fear – if your child goes out he will be snatched by the child catcher, any old lady giving your child sweets is trying to poison him, talking to strangers can lead to all kinds of trouble…. don’t do it.  And yet, by having these fears in mind we are constantly eliminating the possibility of feedback.  What is better, a bit of risk, a bit of failure and a good deal of feedback OR lock yourself up, take no risks, hide behind the sofa and be safe?  I know what route I’m taking….. AND I’m encouraging my kids to go the same way.

And in the spirit of the post, here is a picture of the pie I didn’t dare to post the other day.  It didn’t look great, but it tasted fantastic…. d’you like the way I managed to twirl the middle:

Imperfect pie - perfect taste though!

You’re probably not interested in NLP, but just in case, here are some others posts from the series:

How do others see you?
The NLP of Horrid Henry
Change your thoughts, change your world
Into the zone, writing with NLP

 

 

 

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